Singapore snapshot - 1

Whether on Orchard Road, at the Singapore Zoo or Jurong Bird Park - look left, look right and chances are you willl bump into an Indian tourist. It's kind of strange and ironic then, to see a taxi painted with signage of 'Incredible India' zoom past.

Almost as if to tell us hey, whatcha doin' here?

Trouble is, it's cheaper and easier to fly out of India on a holiday than within the country. Take Kerala - hotels are astronomically priced. Or the North east - costs the same or even more than travelling to south east Asia. And figuring out the logistics is far tougher.

Of course, the "Incredible India" taxi is not aimed at us, but at Singaporeans and other visiting foreigners. "Discover Hong Kong" and "Visit Malaysia" have also taken over taxis, so chalo hum logon ne bhi aath das paint karwa li. Good to see our Tourist Promotion Board making some efforts.

Now if only we could learn a thing or two from all these countries on how to improve the actual India experience. The proof of the pudding for the tourist is in the taxi he hails in India - not the one painted like a peacock in Singapore.

Will there be a day when a first time visitor can expect to land at Mumbai airport and hail a clean, air conditioned cab which does not charge three times the actual fare?

Happy Diwali and...

you may not hear from me for a while. Am in Singapore - on vacation - for the next 2 weeks. May/ may not blog. Definitely will not answer email :) Hoping to de-addict myself from the digital world.

Have a safe and happy Diwali and a prosperous New Year!

Kentucky Fried disowns the chicken.

Economic Times reports:

Burdened with a name and an international legacy that's enough to drive away a third of Indian consumers who happen to be vegetarian, KFC is desperately repositioning itself as any other fast food chain serving "irresistibly tasty food" and not just chicken. Its research showed that nearly 97% of urban Indians eat out in groups of three or more, and at least one of them a vegetarian, would mind going to a place that specialised in non-vegetarian food.

I'm sorry, this makes no sense to me.

McDonald's stands for burgers and fries. Subway for sandwiches and Pizza Hut for pizza. These places can attract vegetarians by having separate cooking/ assembly areas. But KFC stands for chicken. You can shorten your name to KFC but the C still stands for chicken.

This is the very reason it's had to much success, in countries like China. A country where KFC is opening 250 outlets every year! As Time magazine notes:

KFC outlets outnumber Golden Arches by more than 3 to 2 in the mainland... Part of KFC's triumph can be attributed to its first-mover advantage. At the same time, KFC had something other than the novelty factor going for it—the main item on the menu was familiar to Chinese. "You don't have to be a genius to sell chicken in China," says Jim Bryant, who brought Subway sandwich shops to China.

Getting back to India. Yes, we have a lot of vegetarians. A recent CNN IBN-Hindu poll placed the 'veg' population at 31%. Another 9% will eat only egg from the non-veg list.

That leaves 60% of the population which eats non-veg. And chicken is a universal favourite.

I hear what the research is saying. But the idea of ordering veg pulav at a Kentucky Fried Chicken, according to a young colleague, is like asking a Demonic Resurrection fan about Ravi Shankar's cassette!

What's more, this guy has been a loyal KFC customer in the Gulf (he still salivates over their all-you-can-eat-for-20dhs offer). But he's none too happy with his Indian KFC experience.

"When you bite into the chicken leg you would expect a certain amount of meat to be seen, the white fleshy part but no, instead you hit the bone. THERE IS NO FLESH ON THIS ONE..."

There could be a pricing issue as well. 4 pieces of chicken, coleslaw and two cold drinks cost 275 bucks.

If I were KFC I would concentrate on this core audience. Nahin to woh murga bhi haath se nikal jayega...!

Because vegetarians like me are unlikely to walk in there and order that veg pulao. The big problem I have - which I am sure turns on chicken lovers - is the smell. So much fried chicken under one roof, with people going crunch-crunch-crunch does nothing for my appetite. Especially when there are so many other options!

Yabba 'dabba' do

Much has been written about Mumbai's dabbawalas. They've been the subject of documentaries, got invited to Prince Charles and Camilla's wedding and lecture students at bschools.

Now those humble but iconic aluminium dabbas are part of a sculpture! Yup, that's a picture of an installation at the Grand Hyatt hotel in Mumbai. Pretty cool, I thought.

On the other hand, I'm not sure about the long term prospects of dabbawalas. Yes, as the BBC notes, every morning 65-year-old Dhondu Chaudhary picks up a lunchbox from Arpana Rao's home in the suburbs of Mumbai.

Mrs Rao relies on Mr Chaudhary to get her husband's daily lunch delivered to Mumbai's financial district where he works. That is about an hour away from her home - and looking after her new baby means she barely has time for herself, let alone find the time to deliver a tiffin, or lunchbox, to her husband's office.

But, er, for how long? This model where ladies lovingly cook lunches for their toiling husbands will eventually die out, I think. But that won't be the end of 'home cooked tiffins'. Housewives and small businesses operating on a commercial basis will grow in number and use the dabba distribution method.

Meeanwhile, the dabbawalas realise they must do something to 'change with the times'. So they have launched a website - mydabbawala.com, making it easier for prospective customers to contact them. Not a very well designed - or functional - site but a small step forward.

You can 'apply dabba online' - which currently means you can email them your interest in their services. But why not go a step further and have a listing of those from whom you can actually order a lunch. Assuming you are a young bachelor, have a wife who can't/ won't cook for you or happen to be a wife in need of a dabba at office?

That would increase 'dabba traffic' much faster. The listing could be on the basis of kind of food served - veg/ non veg, Punjabi, Gujarati, Goan etc. Day-wise menus and prices could be given as well. In fact, in the longer run, the dabbawalas could install a payment gateway and charge a small fee for every monthly order processed through their site.

Lastly, I have no idea why they are selling a mug with a butterfly design on their website. Given all the amazing publicity they've got - wouldn't it make sense to sell dabbas as tourist souvenirs? Not just on the website but on Colaba Causeway.

I'm sure it'd get listed by Lonely Planet and those crazy foreigners will find some novel use for 'em. Just like the imaginative mind which conjured that sculpture!

Shiro pic

On second thought, this one pic from my digicam was not sooo bad. So putting it up for those who'd like some idea of what it's like inside Shiro!

Get blown away at Shiro: Mumbai's trendy new nightspot

I don't go gaga over nightspots too often. That's because I rarely visit them.

Well, cosmic forces combined to take me to a place so amazing I feel compelled to write about it. Coz there are clubs and there are lounges and there is Shiro. The moment you enter, your jaw will drop and you'll say "Wow!"

Never heard of it? Well, neither had I. Which is why I first took a peek into the Hard Rock Cafe located in the same mill compound. Verdict: yummy. But having been to a couple of Hard Rocks in other parts of the world, we thought let's give this Shiro place a chance.

And what do you know. Inside a plain, unmarked wooden door lies a world in itself.

The very first thing that hits you is a 50 foot high stone sculpture - whoa! Coupled with the soothing sound of water, dim lighting and oodles and oodles of space. So much space that you suddenly feel "this can't be Bombay.. it just can't".

We were led upstairs (yes, there are two levels) where the two of us chose a luxurious sofa to loll on. Right opposite, on the wall, was a fantastic wall sculpture - the kind you might see in Khajuraho - except these weren't kinky and the faces are all south East Asian.

In a corner there's bamboo shoots gently swaying, look above and there's a 100 ft high ceiling. Giant red lamps dangle from the ceiling - more for decor than lighting. The seating area to the side of us resembles a 4 poster bed with gauzy, golden curtains. The 'table' in front of me is a low wooden chest.

Close your eyes and gurgling water and soothing music give you a sensory massage. In 10 minutes you are completely relaxed. Ah, now for the menu.

There's a wide and interesting range of drinks, although gven the lighting, it takes effort to squint at the menu. Cocktails with names like Balinese beach and Shanghai sunset. Margaritas nicknamed 'irresistible concubines'. And something called shochutinis (martinis made with Japanese rice wine). Prices range between Rs 250-475.

I tried out the wine cocktail 'fortified with vodka' in cranberry-black currant flavour (Rs 325). Very nice.

There is a wide range of eats of the Japanese-Korean variety. The menu includes stuff like Norwegian salmon (5 pieces for Rs 500), sashimi platters (Rs 700 to Rs 1850, depending on number of pieces). There were many items on the menu mentioned as "bulgogi in bao" ie chicken bulgogi in bao, beef bulgogi in bao. Pata nahin kya hai but sounded intriguing!

There are a decent number of vegetarian options but only if you like tofu/ shitake mushrooms (which are an ingredient in almost everything here).

My friend tried chi-chow dumplings (which are like chicken momos, Rs 250) while I, the ghaas-phoos lover went for mixed veg dumplings with glass noodles (Rs 175). When it came, I could hardly tell what I was eating (did I mention the lighting is dim!). Whatever it was - accha tha. Service was cool but then, being a weeknight there wasn't much crowd.

The bottomline however is, food and drink is incidental to the experience. It's the ambience which is mindblowing.

Is it a replica of the famous Buddha Bar in Paris? Well, from the pics of Buddha Bar I checked out on the net it does not seem like an exact copy. There are no Buddhas per se, at Shiro, just a predominantly Far Eastern theme with an emphasis on the Japanese.

The idea and the overall atmosphere may well match - but who cares?

Although it's a really really romantic place, Shiro is essentially designed for large groups. The best seating in the house is what I call the 'boudoirs' - the area which resembles a canopy bed although with low L shaped sofas.

Yes, it is expensive (factor in VAT and service tax also!) but completely worth it. This is the place to see/ be seen at for some time to come. If you're going on a weekend better make a booking!

Sorry, I have no pictures to put up yet. I did take some with my camera phone but those do no justice to the place. We did in fact seek permission for JAM magazine to shoot some pictures... but they are yet to grant the same.

We're told there is a PR agency which is very selective about who gets to review the place. Aha. But what about people like me... We didn't need a freebie invitation. We came, enjoyed the experience and want to write about it.

Yes, I understand they want to slowly build up this place. Keep it mysterious and exclusive for a while. That way everyone wants to come here. And you don't depend on minor celebrities to endorse you to be seen as 'happening'. In short, no hangers-on who don't pay because they grace your club with their presence!

All I would say is, a write up in Bombay Times is not necessarily the best thing for a really cool place today. Yeah, they did feature Shiro yesterday, on some obscure page (bet you didn't notice it!). With a picture which looked like it was shot by an amateur (if you put on the flash, how can you capture the atmosphere!).

Aap hamein gale lagayein ya nahin, hum to aapke chahne wale ho haye. So, no hard feelings. The pics will happen. Watch this space!

Shiro, Bombay Dyeing Mill Compound, Pandurang Budhkar Marg, Worli, Mumbai. tel : 022-24383008

Faltugiri

I don't know about Gandhigiri, but faltugiri must surely be our national pastime.

Why else would someone spend time and energy trying to take Google to court for an 'I hate India' community on orkut with 100 odd members? What's more something like this makes front page news in all national dailies?? Hindustan Times reports:

The Bombay Hight Court's Aurangabad bench has served a notice to Google for allowing a hate campaign against India on its social networking site www.orkut.com. The order was issued on Monday by justices A P Deshpande and R M Borde in response to a public interest suit filed by a junior advocate in Aurangabad, Yugant Marlapalle. His petition said that a community called 'We hate India", which has anti-India propaganda and a picture of the Indian flag being burnt, has been created on orkut.

Um, 103 odd members is hardly a 'hate campaign'. It's a whisper in a room with no people!

Type the word 'hate' in the Orkut communities 'search' box and this is the top 5:

# 1 I hate to wake up early 82,269 members
Community for those who can't stand waking up early in the morning!

# 2 I hate ekta kapoor 32,552 members
isnt there anything left in life of women apart from plotting against each other & sleeping around with there husband's friends????? may god help me out!!!!!!! --

# 3 I Hate Himesh Reshammiya 23,133 members
Save the humanity, Please don't sing

# 4 I HATE EXAMS! 15,014 members
Y do we have to take EXAMS ..they really suks sometimes..
i don't care if u don't agree with me..this community showup the feelings about taking freakin exams ..if some one doesn't like it i must say "WHO INVITED U"

# 5 Himesh Reshamiya Hate Club 11,034 members
Are you fed up with all those noisy,crappy songs of Himesh Reshamiya.Do you feel like taking off the cap from his head(he wears it to hide stolen music cds from Pakistan and smuggle them to India)and show the whole world that he is only bald and nothing else...blah blah blah...then please join this community..

If there's anyone who should be suing it's Himeshbhai. But even he is smart enough to know... these are just kids with frustrations in life - or just plain keeda.

Actually most of the "i hate" this that or the other sites seem to have been created/ populated by Indians. I mean sue, American teens are more into myspace but there are a lot of Brazilians on orkut as well.

I tried typing in the word 'odio' (hate in Portuguse) and could not find 20,000 members in an "I hate Ronaldinho for not winning the world cup" community... I could be wrong but I think Brazilians are more laid back and happier online citizens.

Meanwhile we Indians are venting at:
- I Hate Discussion After Exams 10,198 members
this is the community of the students who are really embarresed of discussions about Question paper that some people do after each damn exams....

- I hate Kareena Kapoor 8,374 members
Why do you hate Kareena Kapoor? I hate her for her arrogance and lack of abilities. As if you need more reasons!!

- I hate Shahrukh Khan 5,384 members
there maybe be plenty of fans of SRK (shahrukh khan) but this community is for his haters.

- I hate to study 4,780 members
I know, even you hate to study!! what say? Join in..!
- I hate Arjun Singh 3,594 members

You get the picture.

So why bother if one LiTtL3 DeViL in Karachi, Pakistan has started an 'I hate India' community? This is the last message posted there:

Yaar it's boring community
This is the way to hate someone?
Lagta hay salay Galian nikal nikal kar thuk chukay hain.
Ha jeee---What is the end result???

Aur kya bhai. Flag it for google and forget about it. Please, don't go around creating 'I hate Pakistan' communities (there are already 10 such lame efforts, no need to add to the idiocy!)

There is enough hate in the real world, to keep us busy for a long time. And enough far more important cases in our court we need to attend to.

However, frivolous as it may seem to me, perhaps Google will have to respond. The Washington Post recently reported

Google Inc., which refused in the past year to hand over user search data to U.S. authorities fighting children's access to pornography, said yesterday that it was complying with a Brazilian court's orders to turn over data that could help identify users accused of taking part in online communities that encourage racism, pedophilia and homophobia.

There are some legitimate concerns, and google will have to address them. But a couple of hundred looneys here and there should not be one of them.

Mobile Gaming II

My affair with mobile gaming ended when I broke up with 'Snake' while shifting handsets. Truth be told, Snake broke up with me coz it wasn't preloaded on my Nokia 6670.

But after receiving N number of 'service messages' from Hutch exhorting me to download this that or the other wallpaper, ringtone or game, I finally succumbed.

I downloaded the 'Don' game, as per instructions. And guess what? Two files did appear on my phone. Don.jar and Don.jad. But the game refused to install.

So I asked the tech savvy dude and dudette in my office to try and make it happen. After all 20 bucks had been added to my bill... And we were to review the game before the film released, for JAM magazine. No luck.

I don't know if my experience was a common one. Or not. Certainly I have no energy to chase up the 20 lost rupees. For a game I suspect may not be all that hot anyways...

Next-generation mobile gaming
A young lady who owns the amazing Nokia N70 recently gave me a crash course in mobile gaming.

"See, this is an Indian game" and she turned up her nose. " Really sad..." The game was "Rei's love adventure" by Mauj. Here's how the intro of the game goes : (reproduced exactly)

"Rei the lovely flower girl want this year Valentine Days to be special. She want to give something special as Valentine gift to her boyfriend. She heard there are a lot of special item hidden in the maze garden but people said you cannot stay too long in the garden or you will get lost foreverin there. Please help Rei find all the items in the maze garden so her Valentine's Day will be the most special day she ever had."

As if that were not lame enough the game itself is a snake adaptation where a Hello-Kitty kind of girl-character goes around collecting hearts. And there is no challenge in terms of higher levels, speed, or difficulty either.

I can see even my 7 year old daughter getting bored of this in a jiffy.

"Now here are the really cool games..." and on screen appeared 'Da Vinci Code'. This game follows the plot and characters of the movie - you have to unlock the secrets hidden in the game. But there are some which are not in the book/ film so there is an element of surprise.

The game is mainly strategy/ role play but in level 2 there is a chase so that's where the action part is also brought in. Graphics are decent - in fact the game feels closer to a PC game. At least the kind of PC games you had not too long ago!

Other games recommended to me:

Pirates of the Carribean (it's not based on the movie plot though). And of course the PC classics adapted for the mobile such as Need for Speed, Carmageddon ( it has a multiplayer option via bluetooth), Doom, and Prince of Persia.

And oh, an additional tip. Playing games on phones with joystick controls is hard unless you have long nails. "In the N series, the power button is very close to the joustick. If you press it accidentally, power gaya, game gaya... You have start all over again."

So where do you get these games? You have to know the right people and join a closed user group or 'forum' dedicated to swapping and sharing. I'm sure there are sites on the net from where you can download them as well.

"These games are not officially available in India " says the N70 girl. "So I guess it's OK to get them this way. " It's a moot point whether folks would pay if it were officially available.

The 'potential'
All I know is, mobile gaming may be 'set to explode' in India according to industry analysts. I've written about the figures being thrown about in a previous post.

Given the number of mobile handsets and demand for entertainment/ timepass, there is a lot of potential. But I don't see the potential being achieved unless Indian companies:

a) Produce compelling international quality content. With the Bollywood footprint spreading across the world, I see no reason why a game based on a desi movie should not rival Da Vinci code in terms of graphics and challenge.

Quick and dirty won't work as more and more people upgrade to better quality phones in the next 2-3 years. Pirated versions of foreign games will trickle down from the cool and the 'know where to get it' types, to almost everyone.

b) The other model could be to sell basic, but very cheap and disposable content (games for 2 bucks each - you can play them just a couple of times and feel paisa vasool ho gaya).

Even here it's not just price but the fact that downloading, installing and playing consumes time and energy. I don't want 'faltu' stuff. Right now most developers are talking about the number of games they have made...Not that they actually sell any one in large quantities!

Most games get a mere 7-10,000 downloads in India. I know they also earn small amounts by licensing in to a large number of non-Indian operators and thus it works as a business.

The single largest selling title that I am aware of (excluding free R world downloads) is Sholay. It had 150,000 downloads by March 2006, according to a report published by the Internet and Mobile Association of India (IAMAI).

To my mind, it would be wiser to have fewer game titles but better quality. Perhaps I am mistaken and 'quality' does exist - but frankly, I as the end user simply do not have the information about it.

The gaming companies can themselves identify and promote select titles which have wide appeal. Additionally, they should send out mobile games to be previewed and/ or reviewed by the media - the way audio companies send CDs or movie companies invite journalists to press shows. Given that youth is the target audience, even bloggers could be enlisted.

The point being if the game is good, the ensuing positive recommendations will drive downloads. And if it's bad, well, those are the games which could be sold cheaply. And feedback would be valuable when developing games in the future.

And now, over to their websites...
Certainly, both developers and operators could provide a lot more on their websites. If you don't showcase your wares attractively how do you expect people to buy them?

The Hutch site is really bland - no indication of what the graphics might look like. Just a single screenshot and text description.

The Mauj site is a little better, but not enough. Take this game I randomly picked, based on KANK . There is no mention of how much it might cost me - Rs 20, 50, or 99? And would it really hurt if you let me see a simulation of the gameplay online, so I can decide if I like it enough to pay??

As for this site - it has not been updated in a while. Main hoon na wallpapers are a little out of demand right now. Also, you can't download anything ... Or did I miss something ?

Similarly, Mobile2win showcases
250 + games but it's not clear how I can download them. As the R world logo is prominently displayed, perhaps they supply content in India exclusively to Reliance and use the site to display their wares to operators abroad who may wish to license it for other countries.

But all is not lost. Indiagames is a site with a difference. It's well designed, with prices clearly listed. Some attempt is made to showcase gameplay - check the Krrish game under 'Bollywood'. Not sure if people would pay 99 bucks if jumping up and down is all there is to it.. but letting us see what the action looks like is a huge step forward!

Another great feature with Indiagames is that when you register, you are eligible to download 5 free games. And no, they don't appear to be duds.There's Championship Cricket, F Speed Forge (a racing game) and character based games like Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Phantom.

What's more, instead of me having to send an sms to a short code number, the moment I click on download, Indiagames sends me an sms with a link to download the free game of my choice vis gprs.

I think Indiagames approach is the right one - this will help develop the market and build a longer term relationship with the consumer. This is how you reach out to more people, give them a taste of a new kind of thumb candy. When enough people like what they've tasted, they'll pay for more and there you have a 'gaming culture'.

One additional feature Indiagames should add is forums or allow Amazon-style user comments. I think that would add a lot of value. Ideally, we should have an independent and dedicated mobile gaming website like this one.

As I write this, I haven't actually been able to download my free Indiagames game because the 'web server is busy'. But hey, I shall keep trying :)

As for Don... if any one of you has managed to download that one, let me know if I missed anything! And yeah, anyone who'd like to review mobile games for JAM on a regular basis - do get in touch.

JAM Engineering College Rating Survey 2007

Here's an update on this inititaive, which I wrote about earlier.

Well, the project is well underway. In fact, readers of this blog were the ones were the bakras who took the pilot survey. Based on your feedback, we then formulated a second, more comprehensive survey which is now being circulated within the engineering college community. The survey can be accessed here and is open to current students as well as those who have graduated in the year 2003 or after.

As I had mentioned the JAM survey aims to cover 250-300 colleges across India. In fact, I think that number will go up to 350.

66% of the survey is based on 'peer group ratings'. The remaining on feedback from the college management and Department of Technical Education. The survey is extremely transparent - no complicated formulas or calculations. Points are awarded for specific factors being present or absent and every college rated on a 100 point scale.

However, rather than a bland collection of statistics we will aim to provide some qualitative inputs. As well as some non-serious ones which capture the flavour of life in various colleges.

How you can help
This is an open source project. It can only be completed with your co operation and collaboration.

Firstly, we require a minimum of 30 responses from each college to arrive at a rating. I therefore request each of you who is eligible to fill the questionnaire to circulate it among batchmates, your egroup or orkut community to reach that number. The link is here.

By 30, I mean 30 seriously filled up questionnaires. We are inspecting what comes in and chucking out invalid/ fudged/ extreme responses. Yes, it would take about 15 minutes to fill the survey but anything less detailed would not be fair and would affect the credibility of the exercise!

Secondly, while no important institution will be left out, we are concentrating on 6 states with the maximum number of engineering colleges:

- Maharashtra
- Karnataka
- Tamil Nadu
- Andhra Pradesh
- Delhi NCR
- Uttar Pradesh

We need 3-5 volunteers per state who can help with propogating the survey among the engineering college communities.

You should be:
- a well networked person with friends and contacts in many colleges
- someone who can beg, bully and cajole people into getting what you say done!

What you will have to do:
- Just spend a little of your time, from home, online in doing this work.

What you will get:
Right now - nothing in terms of money. This project is a labour of love. It's a project JAM is doing to help and guide students. A huge and formidable task which we have embarked on because someone has to do it.

And while we may not have vast material resources to back us up, we have the passion and commitment to the end user which no one else does.

Yes, the objective is to eventually make some money doing so (capitalism zindabad!). But that's a few months away and until then I can only offer you more of an intellectual kick. A feeling of having done something towards the greater common good.

JAM t shirts / other such goodies will be sent out of course. But I am sure that you won't volunteer only for that! That's just a survey ka side-effect :)

If you would like to get involved as a Survey Evangelist, email me at rashmi_b@yahoo.com.

Thank you for your support so far. For more updates, watch this space!

Gandhigiri ka locha

Bole to, kal tera picture dekha Hirani bhai. Ekdum mast picture banayerela hai.

Aur aajkal yeh TV channel aur newspaper log sab Gandhigiri par solid discuss maar rela hai. Aisa lagrela hai sab koi yeh picture dekh kar kuch badal rela hai... Sach bolne ka aur stranger log ko accha smile dene ka practice kar rela hai.

Magar dekh na. Kal, Gandhi Jayanti ke din jab apun picture dekhne ko nikla to apun ka kya experience hua.

Pehli baat to yeh. Gorment ne entertainment tax maaf karela hai magar theatre waale? Un log ne rate wahich ka wahich rakha hai. Bole to.. yeh to cheating hua na bhai?

Upar se 'house full' ka board lagrela hai. Magar tension nahi lene ka.. black mein ticket aaraam se mil rela hai.

Lekin phir kya hua na aaj New Bombay ka koi VIP ministerlog dopahar ka show dekhne ko gaya. Bole toh hall ka exit waise to pichu ka taraf rakhela hai.Magar Ganesh Naik saab ko kya hai na, aage ka darwaza se nikalne ko mangta hai. To khaali peeli public ko aadha ghanta udhar latka ke rakh diya...

Ab tum hi bolo Bhai, kis kis to phool bhijwane ka? Aur kis kis ke ghar ke aagey satyagraha karne ka? Kaise Gandhigiri ka theory ko practical mein badalne ka... Itne bade country ka itna saara locha kaise saltaane ka?

Waise picture ekdum mast banayereli hai... mast banayereli hai.

Deepa Mehta's 'Water': 4 stars and no, it's not derogatory!

The DVD of Deepa Mehta's 'Water' arrived at my office a couple of weeks ago. But I just did not get around to seeing it. To be honest, I had the impression it would be a grim and depressing film on a meaningful subject. Something you rarely get 'in the mood' to watch.

I was wrong. 'Water' is a stunningly beautiful film, sensitively shot and well acted. Yes, the plight of widows sent away by their families to lead a colourless and hopeless existence in ashrams is a sad one. Especially that of the 8 year old child widow who does not even remember getting married. But it's a tale well told, and conveys a message without being a 'message film'.

Art without being arty, which is truly rare and wonderful.

The story in brief: Chuhiya is a little girl who finds herself 'widowed' at the age of 8. As per the traditions prevailing then (the film is set in 1938), she is sent away to a widows' home in Benaras. Her arrival stirs something in the inmates of the home - most of whom came there at about her age and saw their lives pass by, unfulfilled.

Particularly poignant is the old lady who keeps dreaming of eating laddoos - the last time she had them was at her own wedding decades ago. Apparently widows were not even allowed to eat 'fried foods' like halwa, puri or jalebis...

But this is no bleak house, thanks to some memorable characters. Madhu didi is the old and hypocritical 'ruler' of the house. She has no qualms in sending out the young and beautiful Kalyani (Lisa Ray) to sethjis who pay for use of her body. In Kalyani Chuhiya finds an 'older sister' like figure and although Madhu didi claims 'hum bhi aap ke amma jaise hain', the mother figure for the little girl is actually the silent but strong Shakuntala (Seema Biswas).

Enter Narayan (John Abraham) - a young man who has just completed his law exams and is deeply influenced by the teachings of Mahatma Gandhi. Including the idea that widows can and should remarry. He meets and falls in love with Kalyani, and offers to marry her. Shakuntala rebels against tradition and liberates Kalyani from the ashram to pursue her love. But life is not so... beautiful or fair.

Without giving away further details let me just say that all does not end well and yet the film concludes on a hopeful note.

Living upto its name, water is almost like another character in the film. I especially liked the way Narayan used the poem 'Meghdoot' by Kalidasa to express his love for Kalyani.

Also interesting is the attachment inmates show towards pets (Kalyani and Chuhiya to the dog Kaalu, Madhu didi to her parrot). A beautiful way to depict how every human being needs to love and be loved - by someone.

Sarala - the little girl who plays Chuhiya - is absolutely amazing. She is innocent yet unsubmissive.

There is scene where she is asked to stand on top of Madhu didi, pressing with her little feet the old lady's creaking bones. The hijra Gulabo (played by Raghubir Yadav) offers her a puri. Madhu didi snaps,"Widhwa kab se aisa khana khaane lage?"

The angry little girl blurts out that she will eat as much puri as her heart desires in Kalyani's wedding. The old lady declares such a thing can never happen. The little girl insists it will and jumps up and down on the old lady, screaming hysterically. The effect is very powerful.

However in this - and many other instances - a lot is lost to a non-Hindi speaking audience because of the poor sub-titles.

Lisa Ray as Kalyani is also extremely good. She has been to acting school since her last movie and it shows! You might argue she is too refined and too much of a china doll to play the character but except for her Hindi sounding faintly accented now and then I thought she was perfect.

John Abraham is decent, Seema Biswas outstanding.

In sum, a movie worth watching. Made with passion, perseverance and against all odds, I give it 4 stars. And yes, you can hope to see it at your local theatre soon... Or can you? While 'Water' is set to release in India shortly I am sure there will once again be problems...

The controversy
'Water' was originally to be shot in Benaras in the year 2000. Protests erupted and a mob destroyed the film set, charging that the film depicted Hinduism in a poor light. This was after the script was cleared by the I & B ministry. So it was more like in-principle opposition to the idea of the film, that too being made someone who had already raised the hackles of traditionalists with 'Fire'.

Although the NDA government declared filming could go, they created bureaucratic hurdles which actually made it impossible. It was a harrowing and financially devastating experience for the film unit and the director, personally

Although the governments of West Bengal and Madhya Pradesh offered Deepa Mehta blanket approval to film in their states, she chose to pack up and put the film on hold. She explains the decision in an interview to Movieweb:

I said I really didn't want to do it until I stopped being angry, because I was so upset and so disturbed by what had happened... It took about 5 years for that anger to dissipate. Once it did, it didn't take very long to put the film together again. There was no way that we could shoot it in India because we couldn't get insurance. So we decided to shoot it in Sri Lanka.

Yes, that accounts for the strange sight of palm trees swaying in the distance in otherwise believable sets of the Benaras ghats. But given the circumstances, I won't quibble about that!

I think it was important for this film to be made - for reasons of creative and artistic freedom. And it turned out better for going through this trial by fire. The original cast - Shabana Azmi, Nandita Das and oddly enough Akshay Kumar - had to be changed. But knowing that, not for a moment do I feel 'oh, they would have been better'.

Deepa Mehta herself acknowledges she grew and changed over the period. Hence while the script remained the same she changed her approach. She let the camera and actors convey emotions and relied less on dialogue. Which was a very smart thing, cinematically speaking.

The question remains, is 'Water' derogatory to Hindus and Hinduism? Quite the contrary!

I am an Indian, a Hindu and a woman. As I watched the film two thoughts crossed my mind:
a) How lucky I am to be born today, and not 70 years ago
b) How much India has changed - and mostly for the better - since the period depicted in the film.

In fact the film made me feel positive about being a Hindu and a woman. Because in the span of about 3 generations we have been able to institute major and sweeping reforms in our society.

This is of course most true in educated and middle class homes - here widows lead fairly normal lives. They do not tonsure their heads or even wear white. And remarriage is not uncommon.

No doubt ashrams for destitute widows exist, and on many fronts, women still get exploited. Yes, child marriage continues but there is progress - the statistic is 1 in 18 in Rajasthan - the state with the highest prevalence. And technically, child marriage is illegal.

I wish that somewhere Deepa Mehta had acknowledged this fact. She ends the film with the statement:

"According to the census in 2001 there were over 34 million widows in India, many of them still living in conditions of social, economic and cultural deprivation".

There is more than a grain of truth in that - but the truth is multi faceted. It's NOT 1938 any longer. A line from the film maker stating the fact that child marriage is an illegal and declining practice, and 'child widows' like Sarala more uncommon than the norm, would not have hurt anyone. And surely enlightened a few.

Here's the line she takes in most interviews anyways.

Child marriages are illegal in India these days. That's why film is set in 1938 –there were child marriages prevalent then. Child marriages go back to 11th century, to Mongolian invasion – they would not rape or pillage women or youngsters that were married. So parents got their young children married, and it became part of the culture.

So you see, it's not all about religion anyways. A lot of our rites and rituals had a basis in something, then that basis was forgotten but the rituals continued. Especially those which were convenient.

As Narayan explains in the film..

When widows are segregated from their husband, family and property, they are: “One less mouth to feed. Four saris saved. One bed and a corner are saved in the family house. There is no other reason why you are sent here.” And while the treatment of widows is disguised as religion, he concludes, “it’s all about money.” These few sentences illuminate the situation in an extremely powerful manner.

And in the end of the film there is a short sequence where Mahatma Gandhi speaks. "Main maanta tha ki ishwar his sach hai... magar ab main maanta hoon ki sach hi ishwar hai."

How wonderful to belong to a religion which is not afraid to look its scriptures or traditions in the eye and say,"That commandment does not make sense for us anymore"!
Guided by their conscience and exposure to new ideas and ideals, the likes of Raja Ram mohan Roy had initiated reforms in Hindu society, decades before Gandhiji.

The lack of a 'single holy book' means that we Hindus can be more flexible and also re interpret what tenets to follow and which to drop by the wayside. If only other religions were that 'thinking'!

Explaining the significance of the title 'Water' Deepa says:

Water keeps flowing but stagnant water creates problems. Many people in the film, which is set in the late 1930s, lived a rigid life as prescribed by a religious text more than 2000 years old... Traditions should never become rigid. They should flow like the good water.

So when the guardians of the faith start their protests - and I know they will - I would ask them to instead direct their energies to completing the process Raja Rammohan Roy and Mahatma Gandhi set into motion.

That would be the greatest service they can perform towards the cause of Hinduism.

Thanks to Lauren Kozak, Senior Manager (Online Marketing & Influencer Outreach) at M80 for couriering me the DVD of Water from LA.

Wanted: b school bands

If you're studying in a bschool and part of an on-campus band, get in touch! This is for a feature in JAM magazine. What's more, we may have a gig or two for you in the coming months.

All kinds of bands are welcome - not just hardcore rockers. Agar aap acche covers ya phir original Hindi stuff bajaate hain, that's cool by us too. Coz we would love to discover the next Bodhitree :)

Send in band and contact details to rashmi_b@yahoo.com.

Online matrimony: a few surprises

That's a screenshot from popular online matchmaker shaadi.com

So far so good. HT reports that "online matrimony in India is becoming one of the fastest growing businesses, with a growth trajectory of as high as 90 per cent annually in some cases".

According to an Internet and Mobile Association of India (IAMAI) report on Matrimonial Search... in the fiscal year 2005-06 these services garnered Rs 58 crore, in the current year the amount is expected to cross Rs 98 crore. There has also been a surge in member subscriptions from 4 million in 2004-05 to 5.5 million in 2005-06. Membership is estimated to grow to 7 million users by the end of this year.

Several of these sites have received funding and now advertise on TV. Along with wider choice and more control to the actual bride/ groom than the traditional route or parent-centric newspaper advertising, some sites claim to be offering additional services such as profile screening. Not sure how they do this - and is it for the premium memberships only?

That said, my sole experience with online matrimony was registering a profile for a cousin whose parents were like, "Chalo yeh bhi try karte hain". But online matrimony is something you have to take charge of yourself. Responses started poured in but my cousin was painfully shy and did not wish to trawl through the humongous number of emails. I mean, she'd rather someone else did the dirty job for her.. which really does not work.

Online matrimony is a project just like offline matrimony. It requires considerable time, energy and capacity to reject/ accept rejection.

Another friend who got divorced some time ago put up her profile on a few of these websites. Her complaint is that guys are way too 'chipku' for her liking. "You exchange a couple of emails and a few phone calls and next thing you know the guy wants to fix a date to get married", she says.

After one marriage that ended painfully, she would rather get to know someone a little better than jump into another potential disaster zone. But the guys in their 30s who would respond to her profile are in a hurry to 'settle down' and don't seem that picky!

Of course the opposite attitude seems to prevail on 'dating' sites. Most guys on those sites are looking to have a good time ie get sex and do not hesitate to say so in their very first email. As if.. that turns on women. Especially when it's done with complete lack of style.

An interesting experiment was carried out by HT's Brunch supplement a few Sundays ago. One of their staffers registered two profiles on a dating website. One was an 'adventurous, fun loving, 'wants to live life to the fullest' type' and the other a more staid description.

Profile 1 was flooded with response (the sex variety) while profile 2 got barely a trickle. And a male journalist who registered his profile got.. absolutely no response.

Reminded me of my experience with starting India's first dating column back in 1994. 'Saturday Date' was a column I started in the 'Metropolis on Saturday' which featured profiles of young professionals who wanted to meet interesting people, but not necessarily get hitched right away.

The column only featured 4 profiles at a time - many were friends who were persuaded to try out something new. Response mechanism for the guys was simple: they printed their telephone numbers. For the girls, respondents had to write in, c/o the newspaper's address. I would actually screen them - chuck out the 90% rubbish that came in and hand over just a few decent/ interesting ones (rarely did you get both together!) to the girl in question.

And yeah, in the line of duty I too went on a couple of dates. Got bored out of my skull... but I guess someone may have found someone. And now, with technology enabling a far higher degree of pre-meeting communication, surely the 'success rate' is much higher!

The biggest problem
Back then, and even now, the success or failure of a dating/ matrimonial site hinges on one simple fact: how many girls are registering?

I think the 'open-to-dating' women have enough choices in real life, when they are in the college-age bracket. The trouble starts when you finish your education and into your second job by which time you may have a limited social life and little opportunity to meet new people. That's when they turn to matrimonial websites.

So dating sites suffer from an awful girl: guy - I think 1: 10 would be a fair estimate. Matrimonial sites, according to IAMAI stats have a gender ratio of 69% male, 31% female, which is far better.

But surprisingly, 37% of registered users on dating sites are between age 18-25... so I am guessing they are actually using it for dating purposes. But perhaps the 'matrimonial' purpose of the website cues that 'I am not that type of girl/ guy'. As in I may eventually wish to marry you.

What I did not understand however was this startling statistic:

Marital status
63% Unmarried
31% Married without kids
25% Married with kids
4% Divorced

Um... iska kya matlab? Why are only 63% of the people on a matrimonial website UNMARRIED? Yeh married with kids/ without kids ka chakkar kya hai?

And even if there were married types looking for someone to fool around with - or marry again - wouldn't they be more likely to masquerade as being 'unmarried' in the first place? So where and why this data is captured remains unclear.

The only plausible explanation is that these are uncles/ aunties/ didis/ jijajis of prospective grooms and brides. People like me, searching for other people. But still.. it creeps me out.

Will someone from the matrimonial industry please explain?

RJ Regurgitation: 89.1 FM Dubai

The world really is a global village. This, I realised, when I received this email from a reader of my blog in Dubai. She writes:

Yesterday, I was listening to one of the radio stations here (89.1 FM) and the RJ was reading out (very badly) a movie review for Dor. As he was reading it out I realized that he was reading out your review, word for word.

"Since when did widows in Rajasthan wear dark blue clothes? I always thought they wore white! In fact, the clothes Meera wears after Shanker's death resemble a burqa more than anything else... and this to me seemed odd throughout the film.

I also felt that for the first time Nagesh Kukunoor has made a film which got caught up in exotic foreigner-friendly locations. That the backdrops got more importance than the struggle of the characters themselves.

And honestly, I wish he would at best make a cameo appearance and not actually play a part in every film. At the very least, he needs to lose that Hyderabad-meets-Hudson accent!"

This whole bit was said word for word. He did not acknowledge the fact that it has been taken from your blog or anything.

I felt this was a bit unfair, so I sent the radio station an sms saying that the review was copied from the blog Youthcurry and that I would let the author know about it.

The RJ calls me back in 10 mins saying " you wanted to talk to the author right? I'm the author. Go ahead. What do you wanna say?"

I told him that the review was taken from Youthcurry by this person who is the editor of JAM and he asked "Do you have any idea where Jam gets their reviews from? Do you know who writes it? We are part of the JAM *something* (I forget what) panel .

For a second I faltered thinking that maybe you had one of your reporters write it and the RJ might be of them. Then I remembered how he was reading the review. He could hardly pronounce the words correctly, and was obviously reading the review out loud for the first time.

So I called his bluff, and he then started talking about how radio is a free medium and that he can pick up anything from anywhere and say whatever. And that he writes for magazines as well and he never copies, but if a few words happens to come in here and there, that is not a big deal.

He tried to put it in my head several several times that it's not copying. I guess it may not be. But I still feel you should've been acknowledged or at least he could've said something like " According to this review from JAM mag..."

And the fact remains that he tried to pass off as the author. Which is a LIE.

Also, when I asked him for his name ( cos I really didn't know who he was, all the RJ's of this station sound the same and I had just turned on the radio at the time, I was driving home) he refused to say. Which I found to be an extremely immature and cowardly thing to do. His name is Harsha, if at all you're interested.

If what's happening is alright by you, ok then. If not, please do let the station know.

XXXX (name withheld)

Well, it's not OK and I am letting the station know by printing this letter on my blog. It would be funny if it were not so... unethical. To use the word 'I' and rattle off someone else's thoughts and views shows such a paucity of brainjuice that I have nothing more to say.

Google scripting and google journalism is NOT ok. Not for a college project, not in print, not on radio.

Will 89.1 FM care to lay down this law for its RJs?

When did I join the Indiatimes 'Community'?

The 'About us' section on Indiatimes states:

Indiatimes is the most popular Internet and mobile value-added services destination for the global Indian.

Covering everything from art to airlines, Indiatimes is taking the digital age into people's lives, influencing the way they live and respond to changing times, work and transact. In a short span, we have created multiple relationships with millions of users.

That's great - but I am not one of those millions of users... and hence see no reason why my last post on Ford Fiesta is linked from Indiatimes Broadband's homepage, under the "Community" section.

Click on the screenshot to enlarge pic

Now you might say I am being sticky here... Indiatimes may argue I should be happy they are sending additional traffic my way - an attitude shared by most large media houses.

DNA also does something similar although they only provide links to blog headlines. Here too, I think they should clearly label the section as 'What bloggers feel or have to say' about current issues. In the way Mumbai Mirror specifies w.r.t.'Blogger's park': a 'daily column on what the worldwide web is talking about'.

The bottomline is - link to stuff I write. That's fine by me. Coz I link to stuff published by your journalists every now and then - credit it to them and comment on it.

Accord me the same privilege. But don't co-opt me into your community without my knowledge or consent.

That's borderline unethical - same as Fiesta's advertising strategy. In a world of global Indians, it won't be seen as a value add. Trust me!

And I know you will soon yank the link off.. but this is not a one-off complaint but a policy issue. Please take it seriously!

Ford Fiesta - 'go fida' but not on the mileage!

It's exactly a month since I got my new car and what can I say? The Ford Fiesta drives well, looks great and feels good. My cousin who owns an Ikon - and is far more knowledgable than me in this area - went gaga over it. Especially how silent the engine was.

So net: net I would recommend the car to anyone looking to buy/ upgrade in the Rs 6-6.5 lakh range. Maybe you could consider diesel - I did not because the price difference between diesel and petrol is around Rs 1.2 lakhs (including the extra interest cost you'll be paying). And even though I use it a fair bit, by my calculations, it would take 3 years before the diesel car 'makes more sense'. By which time I might want to trade this in - who knows.

Anyhow, the reason I am writing this is the ads I am seeing on sites like this one extolling the Ford Fiesta entering the Limca Book of records for its amazing mileage. The 'Max mileage marathon' was a first of its kind in India, and recorded the longest distance ever travelled on a single tank of diesel and petrol.

Here's a news report of the event:

The marathon was held at the 4.226 km high-speed track at the National Centre for Automotive Testing (NCAT) at the Vehicle Research & Development Establishment (VRDE) in Ahmednagar. The entire event was monitored and supervised by the Federation of Motor Sports Association of India (FMSCI) and representatives of the Limca Book of Records.

The Ford Fiesta 1.4 litre Duratec Petrol was flagged off by Singh, joint director VRDE at 12:37 p.m. July 29. After travelling continuously for 1,183 km, the car finally ran out of petrol at 10:11 a.m. the next morning, nearly 22 hours later! The car extracted 22.43 km from every litre of petrol.

The Ford Fiesta 1.4 litre Duratorq TDCi Diesel, flagged off at 12:40 p.m. on July 29, travelled nearly 29 hours, before finally running out of fuel at 5:23 p.m. on July 30, after covering 1,570.8 km. The car returned an astounding average of 31.48 km per litre.

But what purpose did this serve, really? Here's the carefully worded statement given out by the event organisers:

A brainchild of Autocar India, the Max Mileage Marathon was organised with the objective of proving that ideal road conditions, skilful driving and modern engine technology can result in huge fuel savings, thereby contributing positively to national savings. The marathon also brought into limelight the vast difference between ideal road conditions and real road conditions that could result in potentially high fuel efficiency.

Hormazd Sorabjee, editor of Autocar India, while receiving the certificate from Limca Book of Records, commented, "Through Max Mileage Marathon, we wished to demonstrate that good driving conditions, combined with sound driving skills, and high-performance modern engines have the potential to considerably increase fuel efficiency and result in savings for the car owners as well as lower the burden of fuel bills for the country."

Wonderful. But we all know road conditions are far from ideal in real life. And so, a clause should have been laid down by Autocar prohibiting this kind of banner advertising:

How far can you go at 31 km per litre ?

Fiesta enters Limca Book of records

Mileage for 1.4 TDCi Duratorq 31.468 km/litre

Mileage for 1.4 Fiesta Duratec 22.43 km/litre

To take a test drive sms xxxx

The irony of it all is that a misleading ad is appearing on a portal popular with advertising and media types - www.exchange4media. There isn't even a star saying 'conditions apply', perhaps because unlike print there is no corner you can hide those necessary but minor details.

In the current dratty road conditions my Ford Fiesta petrol 1.4 gives around 9 km per litre. That might go up to 10 someday at best. In fact, the fuel guage is electronically calibrated to project how many kms the car will run every time you fill petrol. And that guage has been calibrated at 9 km per litre, as far as I can tell.

I'm not complaining, because I was aware the Fiesta is not a car offering fuel economy. In fact my purana Esteem does much better on that front. I just don't see the point of a company making tall claims. Record apni jagah par hai but none of us is planning to take a spin on the high speed track in Ahmednagar.

In fact, even the practice of highlighting the 'highway mileage' of cars (as tested by auto magazines) is not of much use to prospective buyers - 95% of whom will use it mainly in the city under more taxing traffic and road conditions. But all manufacturers are doing it... and no one seems to be complaining.

So while Ford Fiesta diesel advertises 18.3 kmpl as the mileage (with a * specifying on the highway, as tested by Autocar India), a hoarding by Hyundai Accent CRdi claimed something like 27 kmpl! And the Pope just agreed to convert to Islam...

Ironically, Ford is also advertising the 'Fusion' as a no-nonsense car. Then why this nonsense with Fiesta... ?

And I think Autocar India has to take some responsibility. After all, their fair name is being misused, in a sense. I am not a hardcore car enthusiast or subscriber of auto magazines but as an ordinary person who bought a car recently, I feel that the consumer's interest should be placed ahead of carmakers.

A starting point would be to prevent the hijacking of a technical record for commercial purposes.

Extra! Extra! Read all about it... for free

This morning a rep from Hindustan Times rang my doorbell. "Aapka ek saal ka subscription khatam ho raha hai... "

Yeah... so is there a new offer, I ask.

"Haan.. picchle saal aapne Rs 449 ka scheme liya tha. Aur humne sau rupaye refund kiya tha. Is saal 350 mein do saal ka subscription de rahe hain".

Wonderful. A newspaper for 50 paise a day. I will probably end up making more in these two years by selling the paper in raddi than HT makes from me. If you add in the cost of the reps visiting my house for renewal, and the delivery charge HT is paying the chap who brings in the paper they are pretty much giving away the paper FREE.

Anything, for readership. After DNA pipped them in the recent NRS survey they are obviously eager to hang on to their existing subscribers.

Of course, DNA is also in the same 'free' boat. On Sundays, the paper is impressively thick, with the regular stuff plus a kids supplement and a full-fledged Femina-type women's magazine. All this for two bucks but wait, in case you have subscribed then it's Rs 199 for the year. And in case you are an ICICI Bank card holder, like me, you might currently be getting it free in any case.

I guess all this is necessary when you are at war with the well entrenched Times of India. Which is making a little more money off the cover price of Rs 4 (with Mumbai Mirror worth Rs 2 'free' inside).

The Mirror has gone to town with its readership stats (8.8 lakhs), making it the 'second most widely read paper in the city'. Of course, it's also the second most widely unread paper in the city. While TOI's readership in Mumbai is pegged at 16.7 lakh readers, MM's is just about half that. Which means close to 50% don't open it at all! That's why there's a new offer where you can choose your free paper - if you don't fancy MM you can ask for the Maharashtra Times.

On the other hand, there is a trend where magazines are upping their prices. India Today - which I pick up once in a rare while and then wonder why?? - is now 20 bucks. A recent issue had a 'free' Nature's Basket granola bar. Mine happened to be nibbled upon... or dismembered by natural causes. Either way, I did not consume it and neither did I find much to consume in the magazine. Which I may add, had way tooo many layers of plastic even for my far-from-activist level of comfort.

The bottomline is - magazines are threatened by newspapers, newspapers by satellite TV, satellite TV by internet. And the internet by its ever changing self.

So everyone is encroaching into the other's territory. Newspapers are doing the lifestyle stuff magazines did; NDTV is looking more like MTV with its never ending KANK specials (a full half an hour was devoted to the making of 'Where's the Party'). And honestly, it was... perhaps the Abhishek effect... but rather watchable.

So we at JAM too have been affected. Everyone is going 'youth' - or at least youthful. I mean youth is hardly a 'niche' anymore, it is the market everyone is desperately angling for.

And that - coupled with the 'free mein lo' trend - is making life a little more difficult, or a little more challenging for people like me. Depends how you wanna look at it... More on this, in the days to come.

No one has the answers - except to sigh "ah, mobile!". If only we could all convert our content to caller tunes and charge 15 bucks to download it and 30 bucks a month to 'rent' the same.

If only...

Dor - 3 stars

Have you ever seen a film which your head says is 'good' but your heart does not embrace? Dor is a film which did that to me.

The story is simple but intriguing enough. Two young men go to the Gulf on work, leaving behind their young wives. The unforeseen happens... Shanker Singh topples (or is pushed off?) the balcony of the house they share. Aamir is convicted of murdering him and sentenced to death.

But under Saudi Arabia's Sharia laws, Aamir's wife Zeenat has a ray of hope. If Shanker Singh's widow 'forgives' the accused and signs a maafinama, his life can be spared. The film is about Zeenat's search for the wife, knowing only that she lives somewhere in Rajasthan. And on the basis of a single picture.

So yes, the story is 'different' but... It's somehow unconvincing. Zeenat is 100% sure that 'mera Aamir aisa nahin hai' - that Shanker's death was a 'haadsa' and not a murder. But we never know, really.

That's the big issue - there are smaller ones as well. For instance, since when did widows in Rajasthan wear dark blue clothes? I always thought they wore white! In fact, the clothes Meera wears after Shanker's death resemble a burqa more than anything else... and this seemed odd to me throughout the film.

I also felt that for the first time Nagesh Kukunoor has made a film which got caught up in exotic foreigner-friendly locations. That the backdrops got more importance than the struggle of the characters themselves.

And honestly, I wish he would at best make a cameo appearance and not actually play a part in every film. At the very least, he needs to lose that Hyderabad-meets-Hudson accent!

Gul Panag as Zeenat is an excellent choice but someone other than Ayesha Takia should have played Meera. She is not bad, but not all that great either. Shreyas Talpade plays a 'bahrupiya' and his role is to add some lighter moments to an otherwise ekdum serious film.... So serious that the lead actresses don't even wear any make up. Shreyas has performed well.

Actually, 'Dor' reminds me of the kind of films which were made in the 80s and dubbed 'feminist'. Zeenat comes to Meera to ask for her help, but ends up liberating her. Convincing her that her life is hers alone to live and that she must make her own decisions.

And yet, unlike Iqbal, you can't feel good at the end of it all... So watch it if you will, I just can't recommend it too strongly.

P.S. Also releasing today isKhosla ka Ghosla. The film gets 4 stars from JAM - read the review here.

Lalu ban gaya gentleman?

He came, he spoke, he conquered. Read what I think of Laluji's maiden b school appearance here.

In defence of yuppieness

In March 2004, I wrote a piece titled ‘Life, liberty and the pursuit of yuppieness’. It was a deeply personal 1500 words and inexplicably, touched a chord in many, many readers.

Two key observations I had made:

1) The decision to do an MBA is more about external validation than internal conviction. The first validation occurs when you are accepted into the programme, the second when someone offers you a fantastic salary on passing out.

2) I'm not saying "Damn placement!" But let MBA students also be exposed to non-conventional choices…“ What makes us tick, what makes us passionate, fulfilled and happy? … If the answer is 'leading and managing corporations', are there any challenges beyond our usual frame of reference that we can explore?

Well, Sanjeev Chandran, an IIM A alumnus who currently works for ICICI Bank looks at the other side of the coin. A recent post of mine received this comment:

"MBA's are highly overrated. I wish magazines would cover people who actually make a difference rather than those who pass exams and then sell soap or shuffle money around for the rest of their lives."

Sanjeev wrote me an email which I share with you. He feels such comments are far too common nowadays:

There's a general impression which is conveyed which disparages the MBA community. These constitute two broad thoughts:

1. What a waste of intelligence that you sell "soaps"- as if it were this useless thing and doing nuclear research was the only sensible thing to do.

2. Walking down the trodden path is wasting your life - This has become especially prevalent in the last few years with cases of some IIM graduates choosing to start a business immediately on passing out and OOPSing (Optnig Out of Placement) rather than going to a corporate job. And the general impression given is that by joining the corporate world one

A. is doing something useless which adds no value to anyone

B. has sold out to Mammon and

C. is not repaying a debt to society (which one owes because one was in an IIM) because one earns a lot of money (and sometimes, by implication - hence one should be ashamed of oneself)

Sanjeev’s take on this.

"I never understand why selling soaps is considered such a stupid thing to do. Someone has to do it. And it isn't just about you paying the Rs 10 for the soap - it is about ensuring that you get that soap and that Rs 2 sachet of shampoo in the remotest of villages in India - a distribution nightmare- which those same "selling soap" people in HLL, Colgate, P&G struggle with every day and solve- so that you and I get that soap when we want it as also does "Radha Bai" living in one of the 600,000 villages in India.

Also the point that MBAs work only for money and make no difference to society seems a narrow view point. I work for ICICI Bank. I am not directly involved with retail loans- but the reality is that we have changed the face of consumer lending in India. Sure, we make money on it. But millions who otherwise could not have dreamt of owning a house till they retired today have one when they are 35. Has that not added value to society?

I am involved today, among other things, in rural insurance and we have insured a large number of people - insured their lives, their loans and their health. People have used this insurance to get themselves treated for serious diseases at small hospitals and nursing homes. It has enabled some people to repay loans when an accident occured. Some farmers were not destroyed financially when it did not rain and their crops were destroyed. We have actually made a difference to all those lives.

Yes, while doing this business, I looked at profitability- because if I didn't, this service would not last for a long time. Yes over the last couple of years, I got a salary raise, a bonus and a promotion -for doing a good job in this area. But that doesn't take away from the fact that thousands have benefited because of the work we have done. I have gained personally- so have a large number of the rural populace. What better example of win- win could there be?

I believe as an MBA, now working for almost seven years I have made a huge difference to people's lives. Most of whom I have never even met. And I am fairly certain that most of my batch mates have done the same - directly or indirectly.

Yes, at some times (in fact, I would say quite often) there is unnecessary corporate hype which disguises the actual work being done. Some crazy organizational structures and procedures can often make one pull one's hair in frustration. And yes, people here do make money!! Unfortunately, most people tend to see only the huge salary figures and the comfortable lifestyles- not the actual impact their work makes.

I am proud to be an MBA- and that too from the finest college in India. If I do nothing else but what I have done till today - and if there is a judgement day- then just my work till now will give me enough reasons to hold my head high in front of the Judge."

What I think
Sanjeev has raised some important points Yes, someone has to sell soap, as well as home loans. And this job can be imbued with meaning if you see it – at some broader level - as reaching hygiene to the masses, or making the common man’s dream come true.

But, I suspect, this is organization specific. ICICI Bank is a company which topnotch MBAs join for quality of job and exposure – not because they offer the best pay packet or post you to London/ Singapore. Moreover, it was originally a development finance institution, which metamorphosed into a bank. And I think this gives it a unique DNA.

The question is – would Sanjeev feel similarly had he worked for Citibank, ABN Amro or Lehman Brothers? Honestly – I think the answer would be no. In fact, had Sanjeev been associated not with rural insurance but credit cards, I doubt he would be feeling as good about his job. The simple reality is credit cards are a convenience but they are ruining a lot of people’s lives.

And that’s the story with many a company MBAs choose to work for. What’s more, you are generally doing a job which has been done before. Systems are set, the wheel is turning…increasing the market share of soap X or paint Y by 2% in northern region might be my achievement of the year. And I don’t think that is achievement enough.

Even in home loans, I think really bright minds must find a market solution to the biggest problem urban India faces today: Slums. People who can afford prepaid mobile phones - and haftas to slumlords – can pay installments for their homes. And I am sure it will happen one of these days…

And it may be an MBA like Sanjeev who finds an economically feasible way to make this a reality. In an organization that encourages innovation and can see ‘wealth in waste’, so to speak.

On the other hand, I'm not saying MBAs have to serve only the bottom of the pyramid. Look at the contribution Phaneesh Murthy made by joining an Infosys at a time when marketing software was about as unglamorous as Ajay Devgan before he married Kajol.

This article in Businessworld some years ago, sums up the story:

When he left IIM-A, FMCG was big. The Nirma versus Hindustan Lever battle was drawing to a close; most people from the top of the class headed for a Lever or a Britannia. Phaneesh made the first unconventional decision of his life. He chose Sonata Software, a start-up in a tiny industry.

To put things in perspective, TCS, a $1-billion company today, had a turnover of $15 million in 1987. "I did not find soaps intellectually stimulating. I wanted to do product management. In soaps or industrial products, most of the product definition is rarely changed. In software, you can use the customer feedback to improve the product," says Phaneesh.

In Sonata, he also started on his first Mission Impossible. Design and sell a software for the Indian market. All the heroics were in vain though. The Indian IT industry was undergoing a disruptive change.

Apparently an ad in India Today caught his eye:

It was a two-page recruitment advertisement for a company called Infosys. There was a small line at the end of the ad: "We also need a marketing manager for the US. Should be willing to relocate and travel extensively." The position did not require major qualifications. "I said this is a company that needs some serious marketing help. For every other post advertised they had at least a paragraph of qualifications!"

The article credits Phaneesh with creating the 'two cultures' of Infosys. The process-driven, conservative software developers... and the more customer-facing culture that he developed, which resulted in Infosys being able to command a far higher price for its work

In 1996, that point was proved. For the first time Infosys went head-to-head with a formidable consulting firm - Cambridge Technology Partners (CTP). The contract was for about $9 million. CTP bid $8 million. Phaneesh and his team's math: total cost, including profits, of $4 million. The majority was for quoting this price.

The sales team figured it would be a mistake: the client would think they had no idea of the project's complexity. So the team doubled the bid to $8 million. Infosys got the project. It was a crossing of the Rubicon. Infosys could beat the heavy guns at their own game.

OK - we all know the Phaneesh Murthy @ Infosys story had a sour ending but it seems to be a great example of an MBA 'making a difference'. And not necessarily in the social sector. There are, of course, many others.

The bottomline is I have nothing against MBAs earning a lot of money (if their work results in profit for their companies, they certainly a share of the spoils). But I would disagree with the notion that ‘most of my batchmates’ have made a huge difference to people’s lives. At least not yet.

But I know many are thinking about it.. and that’s a start.

Lastly, one can argue that the notion of 'making a difference' is pretty arrogant to begin with. I mean, who are MBAs, to stake such a claim anyways?

But then arrogance is ... natural to MBAs. So kindly don't mind it!