Sunday, January 01, 2006

Expect the unexpected

There is something about a New Year which fills people with new hope and resolve. My uncle has but one - hope and resolve. His daughter Simi must get married this year.

She is just what your Great Indian Matrimonial Ad ordered. Professionally qualified and homely. Yup she works at a major MNC but can make killer naan and chhole with her own two hands. Pretty hands, I might add.

Simi is modern, yet traditional. Meaning she is no behenji but has never had a boyfriend. Why? Coz she didn't want to get into faltu chakkars. And believed mom n dad would do a far better job of finding the right guy when it was time to make the choice.

Well, they're trying. Dilli mein baithe hue mummy-papa kaafi ads daal chuke hain. Bakras are shortlisted and forwarded to Simi - who's in Mumbai - for a face to face.

One could write a soap opera about the kind of namunas she has met so far. Oh, even fixing a meeting is high drama. A recent episode...

The guy works in Seepz, she in Andheri.
"So, shall we meet on the weekend?"
"No I live in Vashi. I can't come this side on the weekend."
"OK, how about after work on day - say 6 o'clock."
"Um... my bus leaves at 6.30. How about 4 pm?"
"Ok.. where?"
"Haan but I will be able to spend only 15 minutes".

Whaaaat? Yeh shaadi ka decision le raha hai ya alu-pyaaz khareed raha hai??

Simi has reached a difficult decision. She will have to make some efforts on her own. Register on matrimonial sites. Go through profiles. And most importantly, look around her own office to see if 'Mr Right' might be right there. Waiting in vain so far.

Yes, life is unexpected. Things never do work out the way we plan. On Jan 1 newspapers and magazines recklessly predict the next big superstars, the next big technology. Only to find the next big thing sneak up quietly, without warning.

Let's hope Simi's Mr Right sneaks up on her. Quietly and without warning.

And oh, she has finally opened her mind to marrying someone who is not a bania. That, incidentally was a key qualifying criteria so far. "Good for you," I add. "There are too few good looking guys in our community anyways..."

She giggles, "Haan they look good only on their resumes! Actually jab milo to..."

Bhagwan kare Simi ko ladka mil jaaye. Aur jaldi. Another year and mera mehenga wala lehenga will go right out of fashion!

Wish you all a rocking 2006. May strange new thoughts and unexpected actions make it more interesting than you imagined possible!


  1. "Haan they look good only on their resumes! Actually jab milo to..."

    How true. People are rarely what you think them to be.

  2. coming from an IIM, you'd well appreciate the importance of resume (and its bullet points) to a person's life :>

  3. Nice post, Rashmi (although I guess this has become something of a cliche here :). But the new year wish was the best! May this new year bring you all that you've hoped for.

  4. a bon mot goes as "when we plan the gods laugh ! "

    may we have the strength and perspective to take life as it comes in the seventh year of this millennium.

  5. I started making the plans to meet your cousin untill i reached this
    And oh, she has finally opened her mind to marrying someone who is not a bania.
    But yeah she is right there are hardly any good looking Bania girls. So i got to ditch my parents and find someone from outside. The Bania girls i have met on my trip back to desh have been huge disappointment. Oh BTW did i tell you they look Madhubala in photo but ugly duckling in reality. :))

  6. nice post Rashmi

    let me add this to your new year wish:
    may the new year lead the wannabe brides and grooms beyond the resumes!

  7. lol! HAPPY NEW YEAR!

  8. Finding Bakra is a tough job, but finding a good husband is not.

  9. Marriages remind me of what my grandma said when we were looking up for a 'suitable' groom for my sis - "There is sure a guy born and brought up somewhere especially to marry you".
    Our grandmas make such "super-cool" statements and make our lives lighter and funnier :)
    yes, what you have said is very true. There are many girls whom I know are contemporary, but they want to give their parents the satisfaction of having got their girl married to a boy of thier wish. There is nothing wrong in that too na? We must be happy these girls listen to their parents when it comes to making such a crucial decision in life!! :))

  10. In todays e-world, parents are finding it more and more difficult to find "good" matches the newspapers/relatives way.. matrimonial sites have at least one advantage - the majority of the members is speaking for themselves and not thru the parents..

  11. Do you know how tough it is to find a genuinely nice guy in MUMBAI!!!!
    i wish her all the best....and if her fairytale ends well then maybe there is still some hope for the other girls in mumbai.....

    "she has finally opened her mind to marrying someone who is not a bania."
    :) wicked!!!

  12. I read this blog coz most of the time its an interesting read with rational rumblings.
    But then Rashmi, you seem to be obsessed with male-bashing. I don't know the reason of this embedded disliking.
    Just that, when I see most articles on this blog, well-written and balanced, every once in a while there is this male-bashing article which irks me (coz its always from same lens).
    Anyways, this is your blog, but then one is free to comment either.

  13. Hmm.i wish all the best to Simi! In my case i had outsourced all the Bride Hunting to the " Suitable Bride BPO" consisting my parents, sis n relatives....To read the story of that just click on the link below:-))

    I'd be obliged if you leave a comment there

  14. Hi Rashmi,
    Interesting post, especially so as I shall soon be working on a research paper titled 'Deconstructing Holy Matrimony:the Politics of the Matrimonial Classified'.
    It has always been interesting to go through the hilarious matrimonial ads seeking 'homely/convented/iit grad' etc. brides/grooms. Now I shall be researching the actual socio-economic conditioning behind it all. The results promise to be interesting!!
    Do check out my blog for more info on this and updates over the next few months at

  15. If Simi wrote a blog, this post would have directed some heavy traffic to her website and in turn get her some proposals too.

    Wish her all the best!

  16. Well same here.... my parents are also looking out for a bride for me.. all the girls i have met so far left me disappointed.
    i actually told my parents to stop searching, i am better off alone rather than compromising.

  17. Just found this new interesting web site.

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