The Art of Giving

On Sunday, when I saw Nitish Kumar's appeal to contribute towards Bihar flood victims I thought, haan bhejna chahiye.

But four days later I had done nothing. Cutting a cheque and mailing it required some initiative on my part. And I just did not follow through.

SO this morning when I checked my ICICI bank account online I was happy to see a quick and easy way to contribute. Just before you log in they have created a page which allows you to send money towards Bihar flood victims through internet banking. Which as you know takes less than a minute to complete.

So I did make my small contribution.
And I know that many others, like me, will 'follow through'.

The money contributed will be handled by GiveIndia, so I know it will be wisely spent. Incidentally, GiveIndia will also deliver at your doorstep the tax exemption certificate under Section 80G (not very important to me but could be for others!).

GiveIndia's mission is to induct people like you and me into a culture of 'giving'. But it's also about coming up with ideas like this one, which make it easier for us to actually do it. Understanding the 'end user', as they say.

And well, I could go on and on about GiveIndia but you can read the whole story in my book 'Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish' which will be out on September 15 in bookstores across India. Of the 25 stories in the book, GiveIndia is one of my personal favourites.

Meanwhile I cannot help wondering whether 'giving' means I actually care. Which is the ultimate objective of GiveIndia, to engage us, to shake us out of the inertia of 'me, myself and I'.

The floods in Bihar are a colossal human tragedy but they have failed to move India in the manner of the Gujarat earthquake, or the tsunami.

I think somewhere in the back of our minds there is the thought:"Bihar? Deserves it". Jaata hai to jaaye, good riddance.

Acknowledging the feeling is the first step towards releasing it. Giving money I hope is the first step in the long journey towards making us more 'giving' - in so many other ways.

And not just when there are floods and earthquakes.

As Venkat puts it in Stay Hungry Stay Foolish:" People don't realise that India is a daily living disaster. Diarrhoea is a bigger disaster than earthquake, tsunami, cyclone - all of them put together..."

Actually it's all too overwhelming, which is why most of us look away in the first place!

But more of us are accepting that each one can make a difference.
The starting point - for any change - is believing that in the first place.

CRM, my foot!

The other day I visited Westside at Kala Ghoda. As always, the guy at the cash counter asked, "Do you have a Club West card?"

I do.

But then, he said,"Sorry ma'am, it's expired".

The loyalty card has expired although the customer is standing in your shop - hence obviously loyal.

No communication was sent by the company about this sad demise. Although mailers regarding the annual sale continue to arrive at my doorstep.

What's more, three months ago the Westside in Andheri actually added points to my card (the one which expired 2 years ago). Like one of those pensions being credited to dead men's accounts.

If I had cared to kick up a fuss with the manager he would have renewed the card and given me the 160 points on it, I'm sure.

That's not the issue.

For long years I've heard phrases like CRM (Customer Relationship Management) and it's apparently driven by sophisticated software. Yet in most companies there seems to be no relationship with me, no linking of various activities or databases.

Here is another case in point. At the local Food Bazar, I am offered a Future Group & ICICI credit card. I say 'no thanks', I already have enough credit cards.

But they persist and dangle two baits:
- A bunch of coupons and discounts @ Future group outlets
- The fact that I am an ICICI Bank account holder, and hence will get the card after 'just two phone calls'.

Several calls and two unannounced visits from a verification agency there is no sign of the card. Which is ok because I don't need it. But here is what I want to know:

If I have an account with you, you know my credit history, bank balance, PAN card no. You have verified me in the first place! So why this endless farce?

The irony is that ICICI Bank called the other day and offered me a pre-approved Titanium card. So one department in the bank thinks I am a premium customer, the other thinks it needs to 'inspect the goods' more thoroughly.

I know much of this verification process is handled by outside agencies. But that does not absolve the bank! Someone somewhere needs to create a robust system so that information is shared efficiently.

And all you marketers who conceive of loyalty programs please note: Loyalty with an expiry date is an oxymoron!

'Hum hain na..' yeah right!

If I hear the tan tana na tana ta tana na jingle of ICICI Bank for a few more seconds... I will probably puke. The phone banking system of the bank which pays Shahrukh Khan several crores to give a dimpled smile and say 'hum hain na' had better do something about its phone banking services.

It's all very well to talk about 'revolution in the banking sector'. But is the idea of phone banking merely a strategy to help a relatively new bank expand aggressively? Or was it also supposed to make my life as a customer easier?

My interaction with ICICI phone banking over the last one year certainly leaves me in doubt over that question. The common problems one encounters:-

- Punch in your debit card, pin number etc etc and try to reach a phone banking officer (you may have an automated menu but it does not fulfil every need!).

"Sorry ma'am my system is down.. pl punch yr 16 digit pin number again..."

I do that.

The second person who comes on line asks me to do the same thing! And a third!!

And this is not an isolated incident. Invariably, there is some kind of accident or mishap while speaking to a phone banking officer - or you are put indefinitely on hold. Either way, it's back to hearing 'hum hain na..." tan tana tan tana tan tana tan.

Why not just change your tune to 'jingle hai na..."!

A single call to this bank can easily take 20-30 minutes. How different is that from going to the branch and standing in line there? And did you notice, it's not even a toll-free number!

Yes, on one occassion a higher-up in the phone banking chain went out of his way to help me with my net banking password. But honestly, had the bank used a better courier who would have left a 'We were here while you were away' slip (as is the standard practice) I would not have had to trouble him.

Customer 'service'

No amount of advertising can convince me of ICICI Bank's love for me. The only other time I hear from them is when they (or their DSAs) wish to sell me something. A car loan, a home loan.. whatever.

And I bet I'll get 16 calls a day if I ever default.

Service is when a phone banker calls and says,"Ma'am you have some money lying in your account which could be earning more interest. Can I put it in a fixed deposit? And by the way, a flexi-deposit may make even more sense..."

Instead they 'build the brand' by putting up giant hoardings all over screaming 9% interest. And expect us to sms our desire to participate.

But why should any bank bother? Hamara paisa pada hai to unhe fayda hai. Or so it would seem. A single call from a bank which is in my genuine interest would earn you more in goodwill and future business than you can imagine.

Perhaps all phone banking systems have these troubles - not just ICICI. Maybe ICICI customers are just more net savvy, more vocal. Here are just a few thread with complaints....

Avinash Murkute on mouthshut.com (complaint posted on April 3 2007 - and apparently taken note of).But that's just one of a looooooooooong list.

A thread on Arjun Prabhu's blog started 2 years ago which still gets customers venting their ire (ICICI seems to be monitoring this as well and responding)

And here too ICICI features prominently. Along with Indiatimes shopping and Air Deccan. (I know most of us have vowed not to fly on that airline but let me tell you, but just in case, they have a completely dysfunctional website which is being 'upgraded' for the last two months! )

The bottomline: Some kind soul from ICICI is likely to read this, email me and apologise for the 'inconvenience caused'. But, the problem is systemic.

'Hum hain na' has to be a genuine philosophy for the company. Not just an irritating advertising jingle mouthed by a charming but overpaid actor.